Love and Marriage

1corinthians13

Over the weekend I had the privilege of speaking at a bridal shower for a girl I’ve known since she was born. It was an honor, but I have to admit that I felt a little intimidated/unqualified to be talking to a room full of women about marriage advice. Looking around that room, I realized that there was a lot of wisdom represented. And I knew that the bride-to-be and I could both learn from most of those ladies! So I decided to just share from my heart a few things I’ve learned/am learning from the last (almost) 7 years of marriage.

Anderson asked me later what I talked about, and as I told him he kept saying, “That’s really good.” I don’t know if he was shocked or what! But then he told me I should share it here on the blog. At first I was hesitant, but then thought, “Why not?!” So here goes.

Proverbs 31:10-12
A good woman is hard to find, and worth far more than diamonds.
Her husband trusts her without reserve, and never has reason to regret it.
Never spiteful, she treats him generously all her life long.

1.) Pray for your husband.
Everyday. All day. And tell him you pray for him. There’s nothing like knowing your partner is praying for you!

“A wife’s prayers for her husband have far greater effect on him than anyone else’s, even his mother’s. A mother’s prayers are certainly fervent. But when a man marries, he leaves his father and mother and becomes one with his wife. They are a team.” – The Power of a Praying Wife

– Thank God for him. Even when you don’t feel like it!
– Pray for his physical protection.
– Ask God to give your husband a hunger for the Word. The bottom line is this: if his relationship with God is what it should be, his relationship with you will be what it should be.
– Ask God to help him to excel at his work.
– Pray for God to protect him from temptation. There’s a good chance that you will be the only person specifically praying this for your husband. Don’t take it lightly!
– When u get mad at him, talk to Jesus about it. Before we got married my Grandma gave me some good advice. She said, “When you get upset with Anderson. Make sure you talk to the right person about it. You can’t change him. Your Mom can’t change him. Neither can your friends. But Jesus can. So just talk to him about it!” Sometimes I forget this and complain to my Mom about something Anderson has done. She always reminds me to pray about it!

2.) Make sure your husband is your best friend.
Talk to him about everything. When you get good news and can’t wait to tell someone, make him your first phone call! Accept him for who he is. He’s different from you, and that’s what attracted you to him in the first place. When we first got married I realized how different Anderson and I were. He’s a Latino stereotype – loud, always excited, ready for a party, and chronically late. I’m more of a one-level person. People are like, “Are you excited? Are you happy? What are you?!” Because I’m pretty even all the time. So Anderson freaked me out a little. I was like SLOW DOWN and come down a little closer to my level! But over the last 7 years I’ve learned to love those things about him. He makes life exciting! And I’ve become so laid-back it’s crazy!

Another way to develop that friendship is to find your “we” activities. What the heck does that mean? Here’s an example: I love thrift store shopping LOVE IT! Anderson doesn’t share that love. But WE? Oh, WE love it. So he goes with me sometimes. Not all the time. Frankly that might ruin the experience for me! And on the flip-side, Anderson loves soccer. It’s basically in his blood. I’m bored to napping by it. But WE? WE love it. So we go to games sometimes, or I’ll go watch him play.

3. Make your home a fun place.
As a wife you will (in a lot of ways) set the tone of your home. Laugh a lot. After a long day your home needs to be a place of rest, relaxation, and fun.

Proverbs 21:9
It’s better to live alone in the corner of an attic
than with a quarrelsome wife in a lovely home.

Don’t make your man wish he lived in the corner of a creepy attic somewhere! Be spontaneous sometimes. Eat ice cream for dinner. Who cares?! It’s your home. You make the rules now! Life can be stressful. Home doesn’t have to be.

4.) Find a good church and get so involved that they get sick of seeing your faces.
The girl I was talking to is marrying a military guy, so I asked a friend who is a Navy wife what she would share with a nearlywed/newlywed walking that same path. This is from her: You will need a church community when he deploys. They will become your family! Get involved in a support group or Bible study for military wives. Those women will be able to relate to you perfectly. Share your struggles with them!

5.) The most important thing is just to decide from the beginning, before you walk down the aisle if possible, that Jesus is going to be the most important person in your home. If you and your husband do that, you are going to have the BEST adventure. Because when you’re following Jesus you never know what’s going to happen, but that’s what makes it fun!

And then after the shower I texted these to her. A few little gems to make that first year an easier transition. :)

– Lots of sex!
– Cook a meal every now and then.
– If you can’t cook, cook naked. He won’t care how bad the food tastes!*

*Of course these are just things I’ve been told. I can’t speak for the validity. :)

September 25, 2014 - 9:06 pm

Debbie Hagan - Lyndsay,
You did an awesome job at the shower. I was so proud of you. You are an awesome wife and I can’t tell you how happy I am for you and Anderson. And yes we can all learn from you also, no matter how old we are. You are a precious young woman and I love you sweet girl. I wish so bad Leah could have been there to hear it. Thanks again for sharing. Love ya bunches

September 24, 2014 - 6:55 pm

Lyndsay Hyatt- Almeida - That's hilarious. I'm learning from the best!!

September 24, 2014 - 6:55 pm

Lyndsay Hyatt- Almeida - Hey Mrs. Tonya! I miss you!

September 24, 2014 - 3:09 pm

Tonya Teston Trawick - Thank you for your obedience and sharing. Always love hearing what God has put on your heart sweet girl! Blessings Always!!

September 24, 2014 - 2:43 pm

Lauri Holt Greenhaw - The beauty of "if you can't cook, cook naked"…still gets you out of cooking! #greatadvice

September 24, 2014 - 1:37 pm

Lyndsay Hyatt- Almeida - I needed it more than anybody! Thanks girl!!

September 24, 2014 - 2:04 am

JoJo Moore Miller - So, so good, Lyndz!!! Loved it all and it was such a good reminder for me! Thankful for you!<3

September 23, 2014 - 8:43 pm

Lyndsay Hyatt- Almeida - Happy 1 Month Anniversary, Mandy! I'm happy for you!

September 23, 2014 - 8:42 pm

Lyndsay Hyatt- Almeida - No way! Valerie, that's so cool. Someone else said that too about fighting-So funny! Why have I never heard that one?!

September 23, 2014 - 8:41 pm

Lyndsay Hyatt- Almeida - Susanna, That's pretty funny… and true!!

September 23, 2014 - 6:18 pm

Susanna Morrison Cummings - Love these! Cooking naked made me LOL…A piece of "advice" I've given before is "If you're going to fight, fight naked. It's hard to take yourself too seriously that way!" :)

September 23, 2014 - 4:29 pm

Valerie Thigpen - Lyndsay Hyatt- Almeida.. This reminded me of your grandmother "Shirley" when she gave a devotion on the family/husband. She said almost the exact thing. Such wise advice. Also, just to add to your wisdom of the ones you text. Tell her "to fight naked" when that happens then no one can get mad. LOL.HEHEHE!!

September 23, 2014 - 3:36 pm

Mandy Caron - Haha I just married 1 month ago today..I needed this! Love it!

Disney’s Animal Kingdom

And the Almeida “Year-Of-Disney” continues!
Remember how I told you that earlier this year Anderson decided what we needed in our lives more than anything else was annual passes to Disney? Yep. So we made our second trip to the land of the mouse last weekend. This time we went to Disney’s Animal Kingdom, because we wanted to try a different park. We stayed at the Art of Animation Resort for the second time. And once again, it was Kingston’s favorite part of the trip. (You can read all about the last time we stayed there and see a lot more pics here.) I’m starting to see a pattern here – expensive theme parks: yeah, okay, but cheap Cars hotel: YES, PLEASE! We decided on a whim (that’s how Almeidas role) to stay another night, so we went over to the All Star Music Resort. The guitar shaped pool was fun. They upgraded us to a suite (second time Disney has done that!), and it was a great room, but we decided to stick with the “Cozy Cone” in the future… at least until Kingston outgrows his car obsession!

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At first glance, Disney’s Animal Kingdom doesn’t have that magic Disney pizazz. It’s hard to explain, but you know that feeling you get when you walk up to the Magic Kingdom – a mix of excited butterflies and relief that you finally made it from the parking lot? Then you get that first smell of cotton candy and baked goodies on Main Street USA! It’s the “magic” in Magic Kingdom. So yeah. There’s no magic when you walk into Animal Kingdom. It smells like animals and reminded us of a (much) bigger version of our zoo. We quickly decided there was only one way to get in the Disney spirit and headed to the nearest restaurant for a giant breakfast that we hoped would consist of Mickey Mouse shaped something. The Rainforest Cafe totally did the trick! After that we headed to the Kilimajaro Safari, and the day only got better from there. Our favorite part was the Kali River Rapids ride. Kingston and I were in the seats that got soaked, and he loved it! (Note to self: Don’t wear jean shorts and get on a water ride. We’re total amateurs.) The Lion King show was fun too! And it was the perfect place to seek out some shelter as an afternoon thunderstorm rolled in. The thing I like most about the Disney parks is the staging and props. I love looking at all the details and thought that they put into giving each area a realistic feel. I swear if you squint a little, and ignore all the fanny packs, it feels like you’re some far-off exotic land. And that’s what makes the adventure so exciting – a little escape from reality. Even if just for a day!

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Animal Kingdom experts, I need you to weigh in. Are those zebras real? The two standing up? I swear they looked so fake. Or drugged or something.
I even Googled them when we got home but couldn’t find an answer!

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Okay Disney experts. Which park should we try next?

September 22, 2014 - 7:49 pm

Lyndsay Hyatt- Almeida - Despina – I really think you should come with us next time. :) That's so funny about the zebras! The cars show sounds really cool. I guess at this point the tix have paid for themselves, so we really can't lose?!

September 22, 2014 - 7:47 pm

Lyndsay Hyatt- Almeida - No way! That's so cool Kayla Mercedes Knowles. The safari was one of my favorite parts. Glad you could solve the zebra mystery. ;)

September 22, 2014 - 3:56 pm

Despina Anna Pappas - I LOVE WHEN YOU GO TO DISNEY! I think the Zebra question is valid, I know they changed that ride to make it less 'scary' for kids, as they used to chase elephant poachers. I thought after the change they were adding more animals, but I also think the Zebras were biting each other and blocking the jeeps. They may have been replaced after bad behavior. Next time I go, I'll keep an eye out.
I think you should go for Hollywood Studios next, but I'm not sure if KRock would love it or not. There's a car stunt show! If you explore a bit, there are some really cool museums and places that teach you about Disney, the man. And Star Wars! It's my 2nd favorite park.

September 22, 2014 - 2:38 pm

Kayla Mercedes Knowles - All the animals including the zebras are definitely real! I actually had a rhino charge our vehicle a few weeks ago on the safari! I worked at Animal Kingdom for 1 of my 2 years working for Disney and while it doesn't have all the bells and whistles of the Magic Kingdom, it definitely has a few gems. :)

What I Wore

 

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… to church.
One a Sunday when we had preschool “duty.”
Because a vintage taffeta skirt is totally what you wear to chase 3-yr-olds around.
Also, that explains the wrinkles. :)

Something New

kingston sept2014blog

I’m not a fearful person. In fact, Anderson and I are both a little on the laid-back side. Maybe too laid back at times. Kind of “let it be” people. We trust God with our lives and our home. And that’s that. When we need to make a decision we ask God for wisdom, and then do what he tells us to do. There’s usually not much agonizing over decisions or wavering back and forth.

But.

Lately I’ve been feeling uneasy about sending Kingston to school. Not about the school in particular – we really like it! And not even about whether he’s ready or not. I think it’s great for him! It’s just about sending my baby out into the world. And it’s about this big change that we’re experiencing. I’ve had a knot in my stomach a lot over the last couple of weeks but couldn’t put my finger on why. So I told God how I was feeling and asked him to please give me peace. And he lead me to this verse (through a devotion I was reading):

“Forget about what’s happened;
    don’t keep going over old history.
Be alert, be present. I’m about to do something brand-new.
    It’s bursting out! Don’t you see it?
There it is!”

He reminded me that he is doing something new in my home. We’re in a brand new phase, and instead of feeling anxious I’m embracing this time!

September 24, 2014 - 7:51 pm

Lyndsay Hyatt- Almeida - Thank you Mrs. Carol! It's harder than I expected!

September 10, 2014 - 1:37 am

JoJo Moore Miller - I think I can relate to this post.(: I needed to read this tonight, thank you for posting and for the verse. Sometimes trusting God is easy for me too. But oh how hard it can be when it comes to my most precious treasures…Josh and my little ones. Thankful I get to walk through life with you. Love you!<3

September 9, 2014 - 1:53 pm

Kharmon Wofford - Your post was right on time! That verse you shared is exactly what I needed. God has a way of speaking to us in ways that continue to amaze me. Thank you for sharing.

September 9, 2014 - 4:31 pm

Carol Lehe Sauls - What a good Mom you are. I know how hard it is to let go and let God. But you seem to have it down! Glad Kingston likes his school!

Rhonda Ellis – Cultivating a Home

I liked Rhonda as soon as she greeted me in her kitchen with an arm full of shirts and asked for a little wardrobe advice. She’s the type of person that immediately sets you at ease. Her home is your home. And she actually takes that idea to the next level! With six children, the Ellis Home is quite the hub of activity. But it doesn’t stop there. Rhonda is constantly hosting others – from cooking up big meals for large groups, to teaching women at a monthly event called “Cultivate,” to Bible studies, weddings, celebrations, teenagers just hanging out… There’s always something going on at her home!

And somewhere in between all the excitement Rhonda finds time to run her business, Cultivating a Home, speak to women’s’ groups all over the country, host monthly events, and she even started a blog earlier this year! She is passionate about mentoring women, and one of the ways she does this is through a monthly gatherings where she opens her home to them. They eat together, then she talks on topics like “parenting to the heart,” hospitality, or whatever happens to be on her heart at that time. Her desire is to be transparent and keep it real. These events are so popular that I’ve heard Rhonda’s name for years. Several of my girlfriends (all in different circles) have mentioned the impact she’s had on them, so I was excited to meet her and work together. Even though I grew up with the BEST example of a Godly wife and mother (my mom rocks!), I love the idea of having other mentors in my life. People who have walked the same path I’m on and survived! Ha! We all need that, and I’m happy that people like Rhonda are passionate about encouraging other women.

Rhonda says, “I love the Lord, and my desire is that all I say and write about has His Word, the Bible, as the foundation.” I love that! She’s honest about her journey as a wife and mom, and she always keeps the focus on God’s Word; not her opinions. Check out her blog and Facebook if you’d like to know more about her monthly Cultivate events or her speaking schedule!

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Rhonda posted about our time together and some behind the scenes pics here.

September 12, 2014 - 11:49 am

Facing Insecurities as Cultivating a Home Grows - Rhonda Ellis - […] featured our time together on her blog,  PinkPhotoCoffee. Thanks, Lyndsay. Here are a few of the […]

September 9, 2014 - 1:54 pm

Melanie Gray - Your description of Rhonda is so accurate! However there is one thing you didn’t mention. It’s her humor! Not only does Rhonda ‘ s love for the Lord stand out upon meeting her, her humor is always hysterical and completely stands out as well!

September 9, 2014 - 5:21 pm

Jeff Cummings - I have always been amazed when I have been at the Ellis house when there are 100+ teenagers running all over the property how at ease Rhonda is. She is such a great resource for our youth ministry.

September 9, 2014 - 8:55 am

Meda Branwell - Rhonda has been a sweet friend for many years and is always an inspiration. She is such a Godly lady who always speaks encouragement into the lives of others. Her knowledge of the Word, and her gift of teaching, have impacted many lives and families. Rhonda is incredibly humble and eager to focus on others, not herself. I had the privilege of being in the same business with Rhonda and her energy, work ethic and integrity were wonderful. She also has an incredible sense of humor….I can think of so many times when she has had a group of us dying of laughter. Since I live across the country from Rhonda, I’m delighted she has started a blog as an extension of her Cultivate ministry. I have highly recommended that my daughters follow her blog since they are young mommies. I know she will inspire them with her great experience and wisdom…and, that this will have a special impact on my grandkiddos.

September 9, 2014 - 3:42 am

Maddison Dorminey - Lyndsay Hyatt- Almeida I think I am blessed to have all 3 of you!

September 9, 2014 - 12:24 am

Lyndsay Hyatt- Almeida - Hey Mrs. Peggy! You are blessed to have her, but so is she to have you. :))

September 8, 2014 - 8:24 pm

StewandPeg Hamrick - Lyndsay, these pics are beautiful. Rhonda is one of my very best friends, and yes, everything you said about her is true, and even so much more!

September 8, 2014 - 4:15 pm

Madelyn Brinker Sturgeon - Very nice article about a wonderful friend and sister-in-Christ. Besides being one of the best representations of the Proverbs 31 women I know, she has a delightful sense of humor that keeps all of us laughing! Her hubby, kids, and all she touches are blessed to have her in their life!

September 8, 2014 - 3:50 pm

Nancy Smith - These are lovely photos and words about Rhonda. She truly is one of the most caring, insightful, and faithful women I know. She is the perfect combination of conviction, humbleness, graciousness…. All in a person that is FUNNY, and oh so genuine! I'm proud to call her a friend.

September 8, 2014 - 3:27 pm

Rhonda Darley Ellis - Wow! What an honor! I so enjoyed meeting you, Lyndsay. Thanks for helping me with the wardrobe. I feel like I've known you forever and enjoyed every minute of our time together.

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